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• (775): View more from Nevada

  suntimes in life you find a rare opportunity, mine was bonin my gf in front of the tv

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• (513): View more from Ohio

  So I was just looking through the calendar on my phone seeing what day new years was on & on dec 31st at 9am it says "nude champagne toast". Guess we have to do it.

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• (704): View more from North Carolina

  dizzyuy bat. 3.453 lkos. hoit sx, now im single. blackouteed

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• (360): View more from Washington

  Had a drag queen carry me to the car. So I'm told...

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• (909): View more from California

  and after i failed the breathalyzer i said to the cop "i've never been very good at tests"....

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• (701): View more from North Dakota

  Because i love you. And people show love by not letting their friends shit themselves.

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• (514): View more from Quebec

  Thanks for having me and my emotional baggage over last night.

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• (302): View more from Delaware

  Haha, I gave you the rest of the cash I had on me and you bought 3 shots for yourself and beer for everybody except me FUCKFACE.

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• (303): View more from Colorado

  Oh my fucking god how fucking embarrassing never again will I mix drugs at a family barbecue

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• (573): View more from Missouri

  Spotted: shirtless guy wearing cut-off hot shorts, 1 cowboy boot and a sombrero puking in a bush while his friend yelled 'stop being a bitch" from the sidewalk'. Happy 4th of July 'merica!

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• (919): View more from North Carolina

  I miss her, but also fucked her ex boyfriend.... So there's that

  (910): View more from North Carolina

  Yeah you burned that bridge with your vagina

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• (847): View more from Illinois

  My day in three words: secret purse cake

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• (678): View more from Georgia

  He added me on LinkedIn while I was baking weed brownies in the boxers he left here... Is this adulthood?

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• (601): View more from Mississippi

  Hey, is this going to be a real date, or am I just meeting you at a hotel to have sex in the bathroom? Given our history, I think it's a fair question.

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• (778): View more from British Columbia

  Also fucking you night and morning and then serving your parents breakfast is a bit awkward. And funny. To me.

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