how was that guy you hooked up with?
i used to think blowing a .05 was a good thing
i found out what alaskan girls practice during those six months of darkness
I'm now in all their contact lists as "Pee-Pee Hands"...
ya she's here .. it looks like she just gave up and passed out on the floor
I'm hiding her cosmo magazine. the only sex tip she needs is to not handcuff her boyfriend to her roommates bed and lose the key
Ya he's alive. Apparently he's been drinking Naty and listening to Unbreak My Heart on repeat all day.
Fell down the metal stairs and some guy tried to fight me after you left. I fell asleep with cadbury eggs in my mouth too.
June 16th my calendar just says boobietassels....I can only assume that has to do with you
When he saw my tits he said "wow you should be proud.
I'm going to fix your towel rack. I broke it while I was dancing on it.
This will always be remembered as the Christmas I had 15 Russians sing christmas carols to me at 130am alone in a gas station while I was stoned on pot brownies
I woke up with what appeared to be LSD in my pocket. Know anything about this?
I get off at 11. but they've been letting me go early cuz I've been crying a lot
Yeah well, last time I said I wasn't having a big night I was being strangled in somebody's spare bed
While he was going down town Julie brown, I was eating French fries. True Love
Randomize
