Its not drinking alone if you got Tiger on the Wii.
i don't know her name but she is cooking me brkfst then helpin me find my car.
she hot?
i don't wanna talk about it
i soberly give you permission to do that to me when im drunk
i've decided to use this saturday afternoon to take care of my pube situation
I woke up wearing just my underwear and a headlamp at a different house than I remember passing out at. I told you irish car bombs are not made with an entire guinness.
Sleepwalking naked until I was 12 made it so much easier to get away with drinking at moms now.
we just plugged the camera up to the big screen. would you like to come see what you did last night, in high definition?
Taking a semester off always leads to bad things like having a baby or getting married
I can feel my liver begging me to stop.
You were dancing with his friend and you stopped to literally push the girl he was dancing with out of the way to make out with him
IDK MAYBE BC I WOKE UP IN AN AIRPORT WITH A ONE WAY TICKET TO LONDON
Pretty sure the delivery guy saw me taking a shit this morning
I was so drunk, he put me to bed and went down stairs to hang out with his friends. Apparently, I was curled up in the closet, spooning the dresser when he came back up.
he's like the highest ranking tongue wizard i know.
Abby there's no shame in reading porn. It takes more work than watching I suppose
Randomize
