yeah, i liked him til i heard he had a sac that could apparently smother my face.
Sometimes I kiss girls just to make them shut up.
Just saw a white stretch Hummer limo outside of CiCi's pizza. Way to live up to the stereotypes, Alabama.
He just asked me if his big had a curved penis. Awkward? I think so.
Lauren she was gnawing on a dresser. Gnawing. On. A. Dresser.
I keep hearing lesbian porn and I'm the only one home. I don't think this is healthy
I just watched dragonflies fucking. You can't match that level of geek.
4:37 am. You're wearing underwear and carpet skates. Borderline crying. You want to punch Morgan. Have not stopped singing Give Your Heart a Break.
I live vicariously through you. No one mistakes me for a hooker anymore. I look like a stay at home mom of three. On bad days of four.
I just realized I haven't had a date or a potential possibility of a date in about a year. Then I realized I wanted to actually go on a date. But I'm sitting here getting high instead of being at a party. Life.
Nothing wrong with a few meaningless hookups. Keeps the mind occupied and the body satisfied
Fuck that guy and his dumb haircut and awesome dick
He propositioned me for a threesome once so yeah I'd say he has what it takes to run for public office
Look, he's a hot korean guy with a motorcycle and a great ass. I'm gonna do head-titingly kinky shit with him.
He climbed on the counter and announced it was time for something called The Cocktacular and all the girls immediately left. He cockblocked the entire fraternity!
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