we literally hit three floors of our apartment building searching for condoms. also got macaroni.
she asked me if i can do her a favor, came over, and gave me head then left. i still dont understand how that was a favor for her.
me neither. i remember bell pepper tequila but not why or yelling
Hahaha, I forgot about doing shots out of the bell pepper
At second job interview this week. Wearing pants to hide pole dancing bruises. This my life.
it's graduation. he's gonna get congratulations slash emotional i cant believe youre leaving me sex.
she stopped traffic so I could crutch across the street. Clubbing while crippled and drunk is different.
There is not greater feeling than lying to your boss and leaving work to shit in the comfort of your own home
Try explaining "the nature of your relationship" to a cop when your fuck buddy vandalized your car. Priceless.
She kept asking for cigarettes, than just put them in her purse as "savings"
He facetimed with his son when he was still inside of me. If that's not a dedicated dad I don't know what is
she's throwing knives it scares me
update: broke ceiling. glass everywhere
Sean just lit a cig with his taser..... I am in awe
Yeaaaaa...im super disgusted with myself lol...which is interesting, considering all of the things I have done in my life...
My head is bruised from having sex in the backseat of an explorer last night.
Started my new year off by being hospitalized with pneumonia. You?
Found out I'm pregnant.
I'll stick with pneumonia.
Randomize
