What kind of poor, pathetic town do we live in where a horny teenage girl is sitting in her basement on a saturday night, unlaid?
dude i just made a burrito by wrapping 2 packs of scooby snacks with a fruit roll up. im so high
She asked me how I live with myself. I told her one night at a time.
New plan: we get a little bit drunk and go to 24 hour fitness and be eachothers wing people so we can hit on in shape hot people at a gym instead of drunk idiots at a bar.
Watching Blossom reruns on YouTube. Eating Pringles dipped in hot chocolate. Not taking this breakup well.
Unlimited sex for unlimited netflix. I can deal with that. I think this is the first prostitution deal for netflix ever.
The drug dealer had chickens in his house so I know it was good stuff.
Dude just texted me asking if I could drive 45 mins for a quickie dude use your hand
Bitch, he is not your friend and this is not Bravo. Get in this car before you get smacked
I don't know. What do people who don't get stoned do?
Fair warning birthday party last night avoid kitchen & upstairs bathroom if you value your remaining sanity
How do I tell my hairdresser I want a hair style I saw in a porn video?
for some reason leaving your socks onmakes it less meaningful.
I just took like 30 condoms from the doctors office... no one can say I don't try to save my money.
got some info she was last seen with some guy wearing goggles
Randomize
