Did you go home with that guy without me?
Sorry boo - it's pouring and I found a boy with a car
therell be strippers and coke right?
no strippers. just coke.
i hate this fuckin recession
Picture Ja Rule and 50 Cent having a sexy full grown love child son...He's on my bus right now, wearing an outside jacket with no shirt underneath. My fashion sense and libido are fighting it out.I'll keep you posted on who wins.
I have no memory of puking on someone. Was he cute?
Omg. Get me out of here. Someone is playing michelle branch.
i'm laying naked in your bed you should probably come home
move.
we tried to steer you away from them but you just kept yelling 'i need dick' and going back. sorry.
The only thing that makes me want to stop the affair is that I am the Monica Lewinksy in this triangle.
Even worse we were making a sex tape so our reaction to the condom breaking was recorded.
I hooked up with Spider-Man on the hood of Santas car. I kept saying that he could shoot his web at me. Also I found Waldo. Overall good night.
I'm sure I'll run in to him again, there's only so many VA detoxes.
No one parties "Full Karen". She once broke a couple up at the bar, ate the girl out in the bathroom and took the guy home.
It's like sexual waterboarding. You gave me sex so good I'm comparing it to torture. Jesus.
My uterus is doing all sorts of karate moves to break free of my body.
Lost my pants last night. Really need to stop taking shots of whiskey like I'm eating skittles.
Randomize
