Apparently they shut down a cook out cause people were selling drugsout the drive thru. Nice to be home
No more parties with babies... I can't do that again.
my mom walked in on me smoking weed alone, listening to the eagles, and just staring at the river. she totally knew.
its no coincidence her full name and "cling" are the same in t9
Her boobs more than make up for all the flaws with her personality.
he went down on me with a nose plug on, you tell me how it went
We just leapfrogged all the way to the bar.
Every pair of shorts I try on makes me look like some kind of powerful lesbian wizard.
That is like, the point of shorts
My car smells like beer, you're here in spirit
You have all semester to unpack your car, quarter jello shots only last until 10.
She knew the head wasn't all that so she gave me her taco. I'm will in to give her a second chance.
Ugh. I just found a cum stain on my mermaid pants. Now I can't return them.
As a paramedic, it's completely unacceptable to black out on a monday. I cant handle 3 dollar shot night.
Well I kept shouting "you're groovy" at him and then I had a 15-minute argument with the bouncer about how many 9s there are in 100... it was definitely time to go home.
My last Google search was 'can an impotent man have sex'. I don't even want to know what I did with that guy.
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