that was after robitussin, alcohol, and chocolate sauce... but before we finished pregaming
bar tonight had a doorbell to get in and last night i saw my neighbors fuck on the balcony, she wore a nurse outfit. Missouri isn't so bad...
I think we should start referring to bisexuals as "strays"
Dibs on passing out in front of the toilet.
i was like hansel and gretel. i puked a trail from mcdonalds to our place so i could find my way back in the morning
They are pre-gaming a trip to congress...not sure how politically correct the group is.
After all the hair products he's stolen from me, he better fucking be gay.
I definitely paid for a case and a fifth and all I got was 6 beers and a crown and coke. Wtf. Bar math sucks
Apple should advertise that their phones are puke-proof. They would appeal to a whole new audience.
We called dibs on each other's genitals. That bond is unbreakable.
I did a kegel this morning to determine if I had been penetrated during last night's blackout. Nope.
DIBS ON THE NEW GUY.
NO. NO FUCKING YOUR COWORKERS
I'm two shots in and wandering around Barnes and Noble with $58 in singles.
Just for once I'd like my first interaction with a new GP to not be an obvious sex injury.
Its that time in the evening when I've had a few cocktails and wish you'd make a video about the packers and Jack Daniels.
Randomize
