I want to take things slow emotionally, but fast physically
I'm drinking early times at a fridays on wednesday night. This entire bar is going to see my dick by last call.
So what does a sober person do in Vegas on a Friday night?
You told him your wedding ring was part of your costume. not okay!!
Not even drunk me wanted to have sex with him. I kept intentionally hitting my head on the table behind me during sex till he said i was too drunk for sex.
I take your lack of response to mean that your hands are taped to 40 ounces of something.
Well the pizza delivery man was either startled or incredibly intrigued to see me skateboarding in the living room by myself at 1 in the morning in ripped pantyhose
That's fun. I just masturbated and I swear my vagina creaked.
i am bringing shame upon my ancesors with my weak liver valhalla will never accept me
IM FEEDING MY CAT ALL THE HAM
didn't realize her mom was home while we were fucking, but she's oddly okay with it. she made us food afterwards. but then kept talking about having grand kids the whole time. is it time to bail?
Neither a grow-er nor a show-er. More like a no-er. If he didn't have testicles, I'm not sure you could tell he was a male, even standing there naked. There will be no second date.
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU
MANY MANY THINGS AND MOST OF THEM ARE YOUR FUCKING FAULT
At one point I was counting his nipple hairs to calm myself down.
After 2 minutes he came and said, "thanks for everything". I can't wait to hear what he says next time when I do more than just lay there.
Randomize
