You going to midnight mass? we need a dd
She is chewing on staples and spitting them at her cat, I think it's time to leave..
He just made a mudslide using rubinoff and swiss miss packets. This can't end well....
I know you're trying to keep the moaning to a minimum but the banging on the wall is totally giving you away
if you spike my cofee one more time im gona fuck you up. im presenting to the mayor in sevven fucking minuets. fuck you and youir fucking bartending classses i am so fuckign fcked
if creating a fake 8 year old brother, who lives with me and has had mono for the past month, to explain why I have ignored my group project members is wrong, then I... well then I'm probably going to hell
Would fucking the college coach be against recruiting rules?
I am so juiced up on period drugs and coffee I feel like my skin is going to fall off.
Life Epiphany- I need to have children so I can be the drunk grandma at family functions. Its my destiny.
I will keep you posted and someday if we daydrink teach you how to do a footjob
it's ok my mom asked me why i had a guys shirt on and also why there was chocolate all over my bra
He's nice to look at and knows the difference between your and you're. I win.
Leave it to you to bring a trash can into a fist fight.
Yeah well I just had an orgasm on my bathroom floor so there's a first for everything I guess
the bastard is cheating on me with some sleazy barista from Starbucks
That’s his wife they’re back together
You say potato, I say sleazy barista
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