I love how its suddenly "not all about sex" now that he can't get it up
I think call of duty has replaced my masturbating. And I'm alright with that.
Sorry for calling you a whore in front of your mom. World cup brings the worst out of me.
i would eat my own dick if it were covered in nutella
It's official. I am the proud owner of his very own sex tape. Amateur awesome porn or awful delete-me-now porn? Come over help me decide.
Sorry I didn't text you for coffee this morning...bad life decision Saturday sorta rolled into Monday...
I give him a gold star every time I orgasm. His room looks like he's freaking King Midas.
She dresses cool and she's mean. And she has fake boobs I feel like I can relate to her on so many levels.
I'm going to miss hockey season. It was the best excuse to get drunk on a Tuesday night.
My vagina needs her own mother sometimes.
I don't care if it's 2 inches or 20 I mean dick is dick
WINE AND FILM. TALK ABOUT AN UPGRADE FROM NETFLIX AND CHILL.
My autocorrect won't finish pterodactyl for me and I'm feeling personally attacked.
Not going to lie, when I looked in the tub I expected to see what might have been remnants of a squirrel.
Dude whoeverrs house this is has only creeam cheese and beer in the fridge. Thats my kinda diet
Randomize
