I think we should see other people.
Already working on it.
I'm at the bass pro shop. They have a river full of trout and turtles, a shooting range, a full bar, and the patriots cheerleaders are here. I now understand why people are rednecks. I may never leave
I'm at the grocery store buying monistat and corn nuts. thank god for self check out.
Sitting on the floor in my kitchen eating taquitos. Being this drunk the next day has lost its allure post graduation.
well his nickname is liver of steel so it makes sense that his balls follow suit. tell him i say sorry
Today, my boyfriend informed me that I look like my dad when I orgasm
I know we said we never would. But try fucking a fat guy. He put in so much more effort and then made me waffles.
My dream date: Hotdogs/nachos from the bar & tequila. Is that too much to ask?
You need to somehow incorporate the phrase "these hoes ain't loyal" into your best man speech.
Indeed. If boner pill commercials have taught us anything, it's the importance of waiting until the moment is right.
Where else would I get life advice?
We did it to 80's cardio music. Talk about a workout.
But I am still fully ok with my life choices as long as the consequences aren't onesies and pacifiers
Long story short I shit on a sidewalk while walking with multiple people. Then sprinted around the streets of Tallahassee in only gym shorts as I tore my toga off and wore it as a cape.
They left me at home... I'm a liability
he invited me over. we listened to jazz, smoked weed, then cerebrally fucked each other over a three hour game of chess
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