I swear that men would be more efficient if they had a semen gauge on their penises
wasted. watching meteors, awesome idea i ever had, see 2 for every 1 with ma double vision
Don't judge me. He's really sexy for a 17 year old. We made nasty in the womens bathroom at the beach. Don't worry. I wore sandals in there.
None of that is ok.
we had a 10 minute conversation with his family about how I don't let him eat me out. I want to go home
Listen man this isn't about soccer. It's about America and day drinking... Your two favorite things now get your ass over here
We're having chugging races with long island ice tea, I won. To often
He is stood at the top of the stairs nursing the stolen cat
The guy next to me just said he wont play beer pong on principle. Im scared.
wanna come over? I have movies.
sure, what movies
porn or disney, your choice
Ooo, yeah! Thanksgiving will be a blast. Can't fuckin wait for the next round of "have you found a nice young man yet?" Followed by a lovely helping of "don't worry, there's someone out there for you."
if you arent using your penis to save lives, then what good is it?
Well supposedly when the cops came, they say I tried to get them in a conga line like Jim Carrey in The Mask. So....yea
Well I got black out drunk before the rehearsal dinner and berated my family with insults. But other then that it was a good time
Wow. Ok who would waste Game 7 ticket on kids?!
Poor parenting at its best
I'm no doctor but I don't think balls are supposed to look like that.
Randomize
