is it true that cum stays in you for 7 years?
that's gum
i hate when u poo a lot and when u wipe theres no poopy residue on the TP. it makes me feel like my butt hole is hiding something from me. just had 2tell sum1.
I basing my decision on whether or not to date someone on whether I could imagine having sex with them sober
I'm going to rise like a phoenix out of the drunken, shameful ashes that were last weekend.
working out is totally making me break out.. i'm doomed to forever be either a butterface or a butterbod. there is no way out.
She made a roadhead CD. Can I marry her?
All I remember is this kid kept saying that he has a dream that white kids and black kids can take shots together as one, and just we'd keep drinking to that.
You were dancing with his friend and you stopped to literally push the girl he was dancing with out of the way to make out with him
When are you going to accept the fact he is gay?
Come on... He's just practicing.
Ok. That's acceptable.
i don't know why he's complaining, i'm the one with four hickeys on my ass.
This morning I found four opened yet full beers on my desk and my towel rack pulled off the wall and in bed with me
Your actions as of last night have earned you over thirty new nicknames.
I'm sorry I lead life with my vagina.
I can't believe you tried to cock block me from A DIFFERENT TIME ZONE.
when part of the plan includes getting high, i usually forget how the rest of the plan goes.
Randomize
