Tonight was like the Noah's Ark of alcohol. I had to have two of everything.
I don't think he has that. His apartment was pretty much a tv and a bed. Topless girl calendar and a glass of water to put out cigarettes.
I am so horny I keep driving over the rumble strips... best half hour ever.
Kinda felt bad though cuz she whimpered and shuttered a lot, i felt like i was kicking a puppy, only the puppy liked it and came a bunch
She wants to have naked weekends
They call that free range vagina in France
I mean, I gave him a hand job on the Pearl Harbor tour bus; I don't know what the fuck else he wants out of this "relationship"
thought the power was flickering out but it turns out im just blinking
They broke our car window and then wrote "great night" on the next
It mathmatically balances. Less pants + more shirt = fully clothed. see? Not a whore!
Shitty. Well if it makes you feel any better I just had a toothless wasted crackhead in my bar who was mad because there are TOO MANY FUCKIN TREES in Nantucket.
You got this. You survived the RA last semester (granted you almost got arrested but still.)
Who's the naked guy asleep in your car?
"We hooked up and in the morning he emailed me his mix tape"
Is it possible to hurt your vagina working out, because I think my Dumbass accomplished that... 😯😟😒😓
Do I even want to know?
How was it?
Incredible. Everyone in the world should be having the kind of sex I've been having.
He should write a pamphlet or something...
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