thx for the lesson on dirrty dancing
saw you walking with that piece of shit
and that piece of shit just read that
She posted on her FB that he moved out...It's like she wants me to fuck him.
You stuck your entire fist into a full jar of peanut butter and starting assaulting people
Just be happy that you're the pretty friend. Otherwise you would have had to walk home alone, like me.
You kept saying you we're gonna puke and wanted to steal my pants
That does not explain the remnants of a small fire in my bathtub.
hurry up this bar wont let me order big pitchers of beer for just myself
Well that's my green light to bang ur brother. Its not real til its on fb
just woke up on a lounge chair wearing a durag and holding burrito wrappers in my hands
The worst part was when I went to go spit it out and rinse my mouth, his grandpa was in the bathroom, so I had to fucking wait. It was awful. I finally ran to the kitchen and prayed his parents didn't come out of their room.
We can't do acid Disneyworld.
You were in the girls bathroom yelling at some random chick because you thought she stole all the urinals. That's why you were kicked out.
You took nana to a bar?!
she suggested it
he's trapped himself under a bed and is screaming at a robot dog to give him a blowjob
He wants to play improv games now whenever he gets drunk. Sometimes I just do not have the energy for that kind of a thing
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