I haven't had sex in so long I'll probably find some stranger, feel guilty, go w/o sex for several months and do it all over again...always something to look forward to
hipster in red sally jessy raphael glasses inside. kick her.
You know how I told you I don't have many naked pics? Apparently that changed last night.
The class that normally occupies the room we use for my Monday class had to do posters as if for a Hamlet movie and they pick actors for each character and this person wrote "Robert D. Niro"
I officially lit my glove on fire while lighting the bong. Winter needs to end.
This is the point in ur life where u should realize there's nothing left but a spiral of shame
I should but I don't. All I see is an escalator of success
Tim and I found you a 5ish and asked how you were doing with the breakup. All you said was "i can't words"
I feel like we should apologize to the light saber. We were REALLY inappropriate with it last night.
I need to reevaluate. My boss gave me drug money. I overslept on my couch. And I had my student teacher go to McDonald's and get an egg mcmuffin for me.
He looks like he was the one that always had koolaid stains around his mouth as a kid, he can fuck off.
Dude we smoked with a bunch of random stoners in a forest, then group hugged. It was the most magical thing we've ever done.
That's crazy. Wow that lady must be fucked up
Yeah I hope she's okay.
I'm still going to fuck her husband but I do hope she's okay.
I am NOT pregnant
My barren womb can FUCK WHOEVER I want
After you punched me you ran away and it took an hour to find you... On the wrong floor... Sitting alone saying "it doesnt make sense"
Is it weird that I was turned on when he told me he had a vasectomy?
I knew you two would hit it off
Randomize
