Only in Montana can you find Septic Services that would display "Christian owned and operated" on the side of the truck. I'm oddly going to miss this state.
I told him he can't put it there till we're exclusive. That's totally The Relationship Hole.
i just looked up and i was like omg ballsack and then i didnt know what to do
the last thing i remember was trying to convince him to call over his girlfriend so we could have a threesome
Dude pussy is like music. For every person who pays for it, there are thousands more getting it for free.
it's 2:30 on a sunday and I just won a wine chugging contest. I'm never graduating.
Meeting girls and telling em you have no hair on your calves is not an acceptable pick up line
Legitimate concern. Who am I going to have birthday sex with?
I drunkenly transformed into shehulk last night and lifted every single guy off the ground bc one guy told me that there was no way I was strong enough. Don't worry, I proved them wrong. Stupid stereotypical men.
You didn't hold all these dicks to become a party planner!
Go to hungover. Go directly to hungover. Do not pass go. Do not collect 200 dollars
I ran into cvs barefoot with my belt undone and shirt buttoned wrong and didn't even have to ask. The guy working pointed and said "they're back there."
That's how I look going for the pbr.
I just stood beside an Amish man and bought Cocoa Krispies and tampons.
You can say goodbye to our security deposit.
Already? What he do?
Opened a bag of topsoil at the party and spread it all over the living room. TOPSOIL!
Is there a number of dicks a girl can have in a weekend before it becomes unacceptable? Asking for a friend
Remember! It’sa long weekend and a holiday weekend and it’s America’s birthday! So don’t short change me!
I thought you were asking for a friend
Randomize
