i just google searched "what time does taco bell open"
we were frolicking through a fountain of pizza rolls. it was like the best dream i ever had
mom and dad are leaving for florida on 4/20, this is a sign
Guy next to me is looking up how to press his own ecstasy pills. I'm going to befriend him and see where this goes
He threw up in the campfire, the alcohol in his puke caught on fire. Im marrying this man
am i gonna have visuals on this?
you are gonna see the trees puking up fireworks and ninja pheonixes will shit rainbows and fire
one minute he's happily playing with a lighter and the next thing I know, he's screaming and the swing set is on fire
You know you are 86'd from the legacy right? You can't down shots then spike the shot glass
I can feel my pain tolerance has shot up right along with my libido
Is it morally wrong to give today's hookup a Krispy Kreme from yesterday's hookup or is it just fat love?
Jesus Christ. Even your cock has to be an overachiever. :-(
I was on top for a full on make out when in dead silence "I'm moaning Myrtle" came from the TV. Moment ruined. I got cock blocked by a fictional ghost
We had sex to Hey Arnold, Rugrats, and All That. I feel like my life has come full circle.
I just puked on a sprinkler…Motherfucker tried to spray me
I'll start working on my manners when you stop using please and thank you in the bedroom.
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