dude i just saw the hottest 13 year old but she was kinda ghetto.
Your TV has the DVD menu for White Chicks permanently burned into the screen. I can't anymore. That's just a whole different level that I cannot comprehend.
Hey, 'thunder cock' as proud as I am for you getting laid, could you put a muzzle on her? I have to be up at 5, thanks.
Stolen hampster on my tits. Don't tell me I don't know how to party.
Thank you for FINALLY joining the Slutasorus Rex club in this conversation.
Just had an epiphany about how to drink more effectively in the shower. While walking across campus carrying a Franzia bag like Santa
You ate my pie without asking. So don't get butt hurt if I send you link to plus size clothing stores.
listen I need taco bell and an orgasm within the next hour. I'll leave the order in which you provide those things up to you
I just used a gift card from my in-laws to buy their daughter a vibrator. What even are morals?
Oh no. Did we do a blood oath again?!
I'm eating pizza in the bathtub
roommates are droppin acid, i really should stop them from staring directly at the light bulb, but their giggles are so enchanting.
She super glued his penis to his testicles. And shaved off a good portion of his hair after he passed out at the party.
I threw up in 4 different Starbucks across the city before 9 am.
There is a sex dungeon behind the wine cellar. This is why I hate showing foreclosures.
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