he kept asking me "do you love it? tell me you love it" as I was riding him.
and...?
I told him it was alright.
He just kept muttering to himself "stabby stabby stabby stabby" while we were boning. I will never be boning him again.
Hey is it bad when your boss leans over your desk and tells you "you smell like the Rainforest Cafe"??
Just witnessed a circumcision at clinical. i suddenly feel a sense of reconciliation over every guy who's done me dirty...
While you were puking in the ocean I was rubbing your back saying "Just give it back to Mother Earth".
I mean I'm not worried about us not getting wasted. I'm more worried that I'll be doing a Boris yeltzen impression by 1030.
just peed in rthe mens room but seranaeded them with adelle the whole timee so they didnt mind
He is stood at the top of the stairs nursing the stolen cat
you missed 2am bagpipes and my roommate looking hot as fuck in a kilt
Peanut butter and whiskey is not a dinner
Believe me honey Imma fuck the discount out of at least one plastic surgeon in my life
WTF ARE YOU DOING IT'S FUCKING VEGAN COFFEE IT'S MADE WITH NUT MILK YOU'RE NOT A FUCKING SQUIRREL.
We gotta locate my vibrators and get them stashed away STAT
No I’m scared man. She sharted. In my car. Wearing a dress. And I still like her.
Wow
Well the cops were called after the kid fell, but we saw 4 cute guys from our window while it was going down, so it wasn't all that bad.
Randomize
