She was drunk and kept trying to talk while I was in her mouth. It sounded like the teacher from a Charlie Brown cartoon!
I have the worst wedgie. Seriously. Its horible. And there are people everywhere around me.
Slide your hand down the back of your pants and shift to the side slowly
...are you coming on to me?
Did you see Brett Michaels get knocked on his ass?
Hurt me personally.
Knocked his cowboy hat off... Bandanna was still good though
walkin home..,.jsut saw the cheshire cat
watch out for the queen of hearts
fuucck i forgot ab her
"Tonight I'm turning swine flu into an std" this might be how zombies come about. Peace civilization.
I'm sorry but all I really read was "my nipples will get hard."
She soaked the fruit in vodka for ten minutes and then mixed it with normal fruit and sherbert icecream. It was called "lottery fruit".
The assistant vp has a bottle of wine on his desk & I have a feeling my boobs will be making an appearance today.
He took a picture with a naked dude. I think he just walked out of that deep ginger closet.
Yea... The gym isn't gunna happen today... When I was drunk last night I tried to prove I could front flip off the wheel cover of a semi... I fucked up my shoulder pretty bad... It was more of a roll
He said I was really mad at him on Friday. Dude I fell asleep in all my clothes and shoes, with my flashlight on, on my phone... I could have been mad at the wall. It wasn't my classiest day.
I was about to google "rabies and sexual activity." Then I realized I was at work.
I worked all year for this tax return. I deserve to get my nipples pierced.
I just realized I have a habit of pre gaming for therapy visits. Problem?
We'll discuss it when you get here
just learned i can hear my fish chewing his food WHILE HES IN HIS BOWL. im going to have to call you back.
Randomize
