things it involved: vodka, boy parts, possible photos of me on a cell phone. things it did NOT involve last night: my bra, his pants, and sobriety.
let's makeout let's makeout let's make out let's make out
my FASA form asked what i spent the majority of my 08 earnings on, im tempted to put "booze, blow, & blunts"
She said she had a thing for dinosaurs. Come get me now
No. No, there is no forgiveness for this. The only way I'm forgiving you for this is if you somehow convince your sister to have sex with me. In her car.
It's official. I now have that "I was drunk and needed the money" college story to share later in life.
thank you whoever used my nalgene as a flask. pregamin in chem
My entire summer has consisted of being too drunk for this shit, too sober for this shit, or too hungover for this shit.
Next time she asks for a ride to her "cousins" house and it turns out to be a booty call we're charging her for each mile.
Just got smoked out by my boss. Working in politics is great.
He walked into the bar, took a deep sniff and said "this place is fertile and ready for my seed" then calmly walked to the service area
Somehow I got food poisoning AND alcohol poisoning in the same night. Its like everything I love is trying to kill me. I'm waiting for my tv to make its move.
Nothing like drunkenly buying a pregnancy test at 8 am to get out and realize your nip was out the whole time.
He came over apologized for his lack of sexual skills. Cleaned my kitchen cooked me dinner. And gave me another one minute stand. I think im okay with this
congrats on being the token straight people in our group.
Randomize
