Im def. not watching the CMAs. If Kanyes not gonna be there whats the point?
i just witnessed two asians having sex for the first time ten feet away from me..hes having a seizure..what the duck is going on???
i don't think it's normal to still be missing spring break.
it was like that last scene in "It's A Wonderful Life" but with alcohol
im just laying here pukin in my mouth and swallowing it 'cause im WAY too lazy to actually get up and find a place to vomit. this is my life now.
Februarys looking very promising in the vaginal department
Please tell me there isn't another video of me on the toilet...
it's like my freshman wet dream come true
I'm pretty sure you and I ate the entire Keebler elf weed workshop
It is officially settled in my mind that fuck the hot grad student is THE goal this year
I just want to drink cheap wine and throw my bra at an aging singer songwriter
He was stoned laying on my bed singing I'm a little tea cup while I took a pregnancy test. Thank god it was negative.
I feel like we'd have a lot of fun being drunk at a dog show.
ICE CREAM AND CAKE BITCHESSSSSS
I love you. You know I enjoy the constant sex noises
Randomize
