its like his balls were made of silver and he was trying to polish the tarnish off
If it looks like I didn't change from last night, it's because I didn't.
I've grown up since last year. I don't give blow jobs as birthday presents anymore.
the weed was in a baggy that had little penguins on it. i am so excited you have no idea
I just feel like Im gonna be remembered as that one RA guy that used to sell weed
I saw a stripper quit while on stage to months ago nothing you tell me will amaze me
I just met his other fuck buddy...I am thinking of befriending her just to fuck with him...manuplating my roommates into hating each other is boring me i need something else to do
That gas station is used for only two things, picking up moonshine and getting murdered. Only two outcomes.
We lost a condom inside me, I had to fish it out. The next day he gave me a Gone Fishin' bumper sticker. True love at its finest.
I've finally done it, I've downloaded some messenger lesbians like to use because some girl wanted to flirt.
Congrats, you're all grown up now.
I FEEL LIKE A GAY BUTTERFLY
Go have fun. I'm gonna go shower off the regret.
They forgot my ranch. They're dead to me.
Will Smith has a direct hotline to my emotions
yeah, i'm probably gonna die. still gonna be totally worth it tho
You kept sayin "its alright, I'm pre-med" to everything we said. EVERYTHING.
Randomize
