Is it bad that when my prof gave examples of "stalking" behavior, I either have done or would do most of them?
i have more money on itunes than i do in my bank account... college.
hes so high that he's convinced hes a duck. hes squating in the bathtub quacking. that was NOT JUST pot.
dude i feel like at any given point 3/5 of that family is trying to fuck you
Post-sex chicken soup was such a good idea. It's been like an hour and I'm still applauding myself
Stumbled into class and into a desk. When I fell my bottle broke in my backpack. I had to leave there was vodka everywhere.
Stayed out til 7 am.... Did u know there's a guy who goes up and down the quad at that hour playing bagpipes?
He rode my dog to the bathroom and wouldn't stop laughing once he got in. It was scary.
That one dude should feel honored if he were to get herpes from you. Fuck that Guy. He is a herpe.
I got kicked out of the men's bathroom at the diner last night because i was straddling the sink attempting to pee with pants on. Beat that.
Got it in all night, now at a bar at 730 am and we are the only two people here. Somewhere my mid twenties father is applauding me.
I don't care what you say about him, his cock is the stuff dreams are made of.
Were you citizens arresting people again last night?
The difference between 22 and 28 is bigger than I realised. I had the urge to put on Spongebob and give him a cookie.
I am a taco. I am also really high.
I've always seen you more as a chimichanga.
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