I don't think you know how difficult it is to pee in poncho..
i have yet to find a random guy that would make me want to do any position besides missionary, these are what normal people call "applying standards"
I'm fascinated by her cleavage. She has deep cleavage, but no obvious boobage to speak of. Check it out.
strippers are much less mysterious after you sleep with them
Good ideas don't start with we have a bottle of vodka..
I don't think I have ever puked up that much free breakfast in my life...thank god for Nickle Beers.
I just told a kid I was in a wheelchair because Santa shot me due to me being on the naughty list. You should have seen this little bastards face
you said candy land and then passed out.
ps. we found your stash in the candyland game. Thanks.
You had me on my knees catching cheese balls in my mouth and moaning. In front of all your friends.
Let's play another riveting game of "Whose boxers are hanging on my fence?"
Wound up hungover. Visiting 4 y/o nephew suggested cookies and milk and playing Kirby with him with the sound down. This kid is going places.
And then the night went full on bisexual.
someone stole my phone at the bar last night, naturally, it led to me waking up in the bartender’s bed
is it bad that I'm more worried about having to take out my piercings than the fact that I might be having a kid
I have two choices: tits or tacos. I just can't decide.
Randomize
