Holy fuck. She looks like Vin Diesel's stuntman
No. I still stand by my previous statement that nachos and tequila is the breakfast of champions.
I just ran into the couch, vagina first.
I hope you got dinner out of it
the size of his penis is telling me NOOO! but his bank account is telling me YESSS!
I'm going to pre plan my black out tonight. I think I'll set a change of clothes out on my bed and unplug the oven.
It involved anal and pop rocks. Tell me how that could have ended well.
Wait, is this the kid that tried catching a bat in your backyard with a flashlight and a ball of tin foil?
Just found out I made out with the 40 year old Captain of the boat at the barge party. On the bright side he let me drive the boat so at least there's that.
I curse you to think about Guy Fieri whenever you have sex with your lady.
She helped me out of the car and i face planted into the snow.....and just stayed there and took like a 30 min nap.
I'm really excited to meet your new dude! But we really need to find out if he's your cousin first.
No you just wanted to pass out in your hallway because your room was too far away
You know something is wrong with your lifestyle when you have to clean easy Mac cheese powder off of your scale
at least it's not cocaine like last time
I don't mean to alarm you but are the strongest testicles in the family. I just learned I can lift 90 lb with my balls! Beat that.
So what we learned was that it doesn't matter how skinny the stripper is, if she sits on your knee with a torn acl for two hours it's going to swell up
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