I'm afraid we're only dating because we're too lazy to look for anyone else.
he squeezed my boobs like he didn't know what else to do with them, then turned down head...
told you he was gay.
You seemed more interested in the queso dip than you were in the hand job
So apparently the christmas orgy was a complete disaster
Ohmy god im about to fuxk my TA. i thyought this was a dream but i love you. <3
I'm drunk and you're awesome. let's stay this way forever.
Just saw 1 guy dressed as a cow and another dressed as a shrimp dancing on the side of the road. We're turning around I NEED to dance with them.
Trying to find a reliable dealer on Rockfordmugshots.com. Guy arrested for 15 grams of coke could be him !
You realize those people have been ARRESTED recently. right.
It's like some sort of initiation to finger one of them... so I did it. And got high fived afterwards like a dozen times.
Those were right hand only?
I never notice how majestic and beautiful my cat is unless I'm blazed
I've literally exhausted all the videos on pornhub. It took like 4 years, but I've done it. I did that quicker than I finished college
Dude I'm hungover as fuck in a bed in Baltimore with another man... I don't think I can make it.
I think I'd rather see her get hit by a car in one of those Russian dash cam videos on YouTube.
Drug test isn't today. Now I'm just sitting in this orientation with a bag of your piss in my pants
Drunk me wants sober me to be happy, woke up with half a dozen doughnuts in my bed this morning.
Randomize
