8:17pm: So, How was fun day?
1:15am: So I just woke up in my bed in my bathing suit... I don't remember getting into bed or dinner or anything after slip n slide that happened around five... I'd say fun day was a success
just woke up to two already rolled blunts and a full explanation of what happened last night. I love my gf
She walked in, looked at the bed, sniffed, sighed, and went to grab her cleaning supplies. I'd say she knows.
the beer staff turned into a beer spear way to quickly
You'd be proud of me. They tried to give me bread to sober up, but I told them no, im on a diet.
i'm about to tell me dad "sorry staying in isnt an option. i'm fucking a marine tonight."
Well it involved jumping two nine foot fences. But when you mix alcohol and persistence you can't lose.
A beer is a heart your wish makes!!!
My birthday is in 11 days. Going ham. Consciousness will not be an option
I'd rather not be labeled as that girl who came over, drank a bunch of their alcohol, woke up the 5 year old, broke shit and left
I'm a bit broke right now... Would it be OK if I pay you in champagne and Xanax?
I just offered a cat a "drinky drinky" I'd say my night has started
I want an apology pizza with SORRY IM A DOUCHE spelled out on it in pepperoni
Hi I am on my way. I stopped and got the cheeseburger you asked for. Are you gonna pay me back?
Who is this?
ps why does my dog smell like popcorn and a dryer sheet..?
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