porn bloobers exist! never have i laughed so hard while jerking off!
she broke up with me using backstreet boy lyrics
you deserved it if you knew it was backstreet boys.
MY DOG FOUND A BAG OF COKE ON THE SIDE OF THE ROAD!!!!!!!!!!!
AND ITS GOOD STUFF TOO!!!!!! AHHH!!!!!!
And why did 3 people fail to stop me from literally getting a piggy back ride from the bar to his apartment?!
You were wasted and fell in a pond when you met him, it's not like you were on top of your game
Dont worry about the blood on the pillow. its from my face.
Apparently, we were running around the apartment, singing into pickles, the routinely slapped our passed out friends with them.
At some point last night Lemondrops turned into me doing shots of vodka and eating sugar packets at the bar.
Well. Turns up no one actually knows who that kid was. Came in, said happy fathers day, chilled for a while, then left.
I'm just opting for alcohol abuse, ramen and cuddling with my dog for now.
I may or may not have just let Ash Ketchum capture my wild Pikachu in a parking lot.
I'm watching Russian dudes pole-dance. For research.
Did body shots with a guy... Ended up being the ref of my volleyball game... So that's why we won
I FLASHED A GUY AT MCDONALDS FOR A FREE BREAKFAST BURRITO. IT WORKED!
Never underestimate the power of titties
Randomize