I love you!
You're insane
Fuckin crazy man! Seriously though I think if you would have me I honestly seriously think about marrying u!
Alright now lets video chat so I can xshow u my dick! Hahahaha
Today should be called shooting fish in a barrel day. Every place ive gone to ive met a girl who regrets not hooking up last night. There have not been girls this easy since Fathers Day
He's a firefighter, who has his own band. I'm pregnant just thinking about him.
My vag wants to play a game of hungry hungry hippos with your cock.
i know. thats why i need an open bar. i'll get hammered and make a toast about how his dick is like the titanic. large, but full of failure.
some dude is stoned out of his mind in my calc class. just shouted that the teacher was a genius cause he got rid of so many numbers
He drew a bath for me. It was only cute until he started throwing in celery and calling me soup.
Did you guys seriously let me trade my id for a kebab last night??
Do you know of any good hiding spots in the Atlanta area?
Sorry bro I thought you were kidding. If I'm actually jerking off I usually said "Just a sec getting dressed" or something
Let's knock shit down like godzilla and have intense sex in the rubble
I'm high. ignore me
He tried to get me to go back to his place on the condition that he has 6 cats. I was very tempted but I said no. Hoping to go see the cats tomorrow
On a scale of "huh, that's interesting" to "holy porn stars, batman". How good?
Definitely closer to "holy porn stars, batman".
Apparently I showed all your grooms men my vagina to prove I did not have underwear on. Awesome
theres a girl in the library eating whip cream out of a starbucks cup... only whip cream, im way to high for this shit
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