There are few people I can ask this w/o being looked at as insane... Do you ever some days get fascinated by how amazing your own breast look?
so i definitely just saw 2 cops high five each other as they were arresting underage drinkers in 5 points.
This unplanned pregnancy thing is really taking all the fun out of football season.
her underwear stopped being sexy when i saw her pubes sticking out of the top.
Want any specific kind of beer?
Yeah. Alcohol flavor.
Got it. Anything but Miller.
Why did I think it was so necessary to steal that rolling pin?
There are pictures of you on the shoulders of some old guy dressed as borat
2 more and I will have fucked 75 percent of my acting class. best. elective. ever.
he stopped midthrust to put on his sex playlist and the first song was 'can you feel the love tonight'
where do you find these guys?
Where the hell did all of these gingers come from? It's like they crawled out of their shame-caves for st Patrick's day.
Do you miss the park or do you miss us having sex in public?
When you wake up, I have a unicorn coloring book, crayons, mini cupcakes, and booze.
Yeeah, I think a threesome is one of those wedding presents you can't register for at Bed Bath And Beyond..
Your bf is wearing nothing but a cape, I mean absolutely NOTHING but a cape. I know you said he looks like Thor but this is getting a bit ridiculous.
Ive realized that in order for me to understand math, my professor has to be hot.
Randomize
