Please tell me I didn't pass out while we were having sex last night... and if so I am sooooo sorry.
I masturbated on the webcams with my bf yesterday then typed without washing my hands first... then my roommate used my laptop it was pretty priceless
its time to go be "that drunk guy nobody knows"....again.
just ate frosted cheerios in coffee with some marshmellows. the college diet begins
We're starting "No Hesitation Fridays." The probability of this going horribly are between 100 to 125 percent
Who has a video camera? i want to look back on this one day and say OH thats why i spent 2 years in jail
My RA just gave me tips on how to have discreet shower sex. Were we that loud?
Just made out with the bride... She was still in her dress & I was still in my bridesmaid dress, how's that for an album picture?!?
Semen is not good for contacts.
I should have questioned it early on when they said bring beer and chocolate syrup
This guy randomly got in our taxi, and has now collapsed on the sofa anouncing that he's staying the night.
thats why a responsible adult always keeps some facial hair just in case they need to shave a hulk hogan mustache for midget wrestling...
I clipped one of my extensions in his hair to give him a rat tail. What is my life?
Speaking of boners I learned how to say " jizz everywhere" in sign language
why is there glitter IN my vagina????
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