I either just heard my neighbors having sex or she really agreed with whatever he was talking about.
Just saw Youth in Revolt. There are only so many times Michael Cera can lose his virginity.
In the middle of blowin me she stoppped and told me how easy it would be to insert a catheter ..... Apparently she was a nursing major
i wanna pet his head its so fluffy. were gonna open a petting zoo
you trust me enough to eiffel tower a girl but don't trust me with a mallet wtf happened to our friendsship
Last two new years I ended in jail by 12. Can we wait until its actually 12:02 this time to do something stupid. I'd like to spend the first minute of 2012 free.. At least.
I found him down the block clinging to a light post laughing and crying because a house "looked like it had buck teeth"
So help my penis see only you. Give him some attention as well.
She bent over while grinding on me on the dance floor and her thong straps were hanging out, I thought it was a good idea to grab the straps with both hands and pretend to be riding in Santa's sleigh...not my brightest moment.
Negotiating with my body. We're ok. Violent upheaval is not necessary.
Just bought condoms with a walmart gift card. Thanks grandma.
I don't think he liked your vagina hand signal
She's still here. My penis can feel it.
Dude, I think she left with some dude like an hour ago
FOUND HER. I swear this thing is like a metal-detector
I wanna suck that fisherman's dick.
I stole a block of cheese from the party last night and put it in my purse but I got so drunk that I left my purse on the floor and my dog ate it.
Randomize