woke up 7 floors down in the lobby...i my underwear. New high or new low?
New experience?
they bought blue cups instead of red...wtf how am i supposed to pretend im on laguna beach??
Wine smoothie.... Not as good as I thought it would be
i just saw her new tattoo, how much more trashy can you get than having "taste the rainbow" on your body for the rest of your life?
I just took went to the bathroom and it smelt like blue curococo... I didn't flush yet so head on up if you wanna know what a good night smells like.
They had an entire room dedicated to passed out people. It was like a dogpile of cross faded toddlers drooling on each other.
thanks so much for stopping me from telling him i want to have sex with him while i proceeded to hookup with the air.
Penises. Penises everywhereeeeeeeee. Penis ratio is sooo disproportionate. I can't NOT get laid tonight.
No, I don't not want an upside down piggyback ride. You're drunk and there are rocks.
Nope. If I'm going to drive an hour to fuck a teacher, it will NOT be missionary thats for damn sure.
It was like you were trying to communicate only you were using every letter of the alphabet but in no order and in a different language
And he's back on taking these stupid testosterone supplements to kickstart him back into working out. And they just make him angry and horny all the time. I'm like great, just in time to meet my whole family for Christmas.
I would fuck him just for his dog
Life's hard when you can't differentiate between retrograde and PMS
Walking into her house she felt something in her bra.... It was a used condom. Sadly enough this is not the first or last time it will happen. It's time for an intervention.
Randomize
