Ok forget what i said about christmas break being awful. Chasing shots with fudge
I think I am the only girl in the world who would be proud of these scars from rug burn.
I think I'm making progress on my commitment issues. I drunk made out with the same guy from last semester this weekend.
she played "i just wanna get married" by jagged edge while we were having sex. why cant i avoid stage 5 clingers
Just asked the bartender if I could use the register to see my grades.
i was able to set 4 alarms to make sure i woke up in time for class but i couldnt take the open beer out of my pocket before i did cartwheels down the hall...
its like the body should be a temple but we treat it like a kmart
Between my vag yelling at me for having bad sex and my legs yelling at me for going to the gym I cant hear myself think.
People were running around punching out the ceiling tiles Super Mario style.
I'd like to thank you for ensuring I didn't die. Id also like to show you the most impressive bruise you will perhaps ever see
I can hear my family downstairs singing Christmas carols as I masturbate
It's not even 11, i dropped a shot glass, nick is bleeding, and everyone is drunk
the bartender knew what was up when i took a sip of my drink, gagged and asked her to water down my water
I ripped my favorite bra in half last night while I was undressing in a drunken rage.
What was the rage all about?
He wouldn't stop to let me get McDonald's french fries.
God gave you your own nipples for a reason.
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