She kept calling me her DD, which I assumed meant designated driver, so I was confused because I don't even have a car. Found out later it means designated dick. It's what her and her friends use as code for the guy they want to hook up with at the end of the night. I feel so used.
the non-midget kid sent 8,000 texts in a month. the midget parents are pissed. THIS IS EPIC WHEN YOUR HIGH.
she sang that "this little piggy song" to my balls. and somehow made it work, with me only having two balls instead of five.
I'm pretty sure this is how polyamorous relationships begin.
The cops walked in to class and arrested 2 guys for possession.
Ja rule starts his prison sentence today #3475th reason we should drink tonight
KETAMINE SUNDAYS ARE SERIOUSLY FUCKING ME UP!
She poured beer through the deck into the hot tub. She called it a deck shot. It was horrifying but super awesome at the same time.
There is what appears to be urine on the woman's bathroom sink. I just have so many questions right now.
Because it's not worth it. And there is no nice way of saying "sorry, you're not good enough at sex for me to drive 45 mins"
I'm pretty sure ignoring the person that just sent you a picture of their boobs is bad nude etiquette.
I also don't hate being called a giant sack of cheese. Is that weird?
That's how pantless uber rides happen
He just looks like he'd be good in bed. He looks like he has a lot of anger built up in him and all I'm saying is that if he took out on my vagina I'm cool with that
I’ve slept with a Senior, a Freshman and a Junior so far. I’m a Sophomore away from hitting for the cycle
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