Just ran to the store on my way to the office to buy Diet Coke...the guy in front of me let me cut because it was 4 more minutes until 8am, so he wouldn't be able to purchase his vodka. I love Wisconsin
If only Ben were 51% gay instead of 49%
I was high enough to think chocolate sauce on bagel bites was a good idea
I've come to accept that no matter where I step in our apartment, your underwear will be there.
He is in the front yard trying to catch birds out of the air with a fishing net.
But i don't feel like talking to him right now. I woke up an hour ago to a picture of his penis and I AM NOT A MORNING PERSON.
She kept saying how cute and adorable I was. I felt like a care bear getting a blowjob
At least now when I say "never again" the likelihood is that it won't actually happen again the next weekend...that my friend is called growth
You said that we all need to "head out like a boner through sweatpants and get fucked." Jager night was a success.
I really want some funfetti cake but I feel like its more socially acceptable to go out and drink
Two chicks walked outta his room and all he did was beat his chest like LeBron and yell, "And 1!"
I threw up in a pringles can. how do you think my night went.
ill be home in an hour. Be in my bed ready for disappointment
why do guys have to express their feelings when they know your seeing someone else ? I fucked him anyways to make him feel better , and to know what he's missing.
Do you remember vividly describing the shape and girth of my cock to that girl last night?
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