Honestly there's alot of things I'm confused about the only thing I know for certain about last night is that I ate pizza
what is the aproppriate waiting time between having sex and playing super Mario brothers
6 min
Guy in the room next to us in the ER is chanting "I'm jeff and I'm drunk". He's trying to get released to finish tailgating for the Iowa game that starts in 9 hours.
I just threw up blood. Also i just remembered i got hit in the face with a 2 by 4.
I was trying to be an adult about it and simply deal with the situation, but a bowl seemed much more comforting.
I've smoked enough weed to put down a pony.
The thing i'm gunna miss the most about college is peeing while brushing my teeth in the shower without being judged. You just can't do that anywhere else
Our first kiss happened while shot gunning a hit from a gravity bong. Its that type of relationship.
I was thirsty after the sex and it was a long trek back to res so naturally I stole chocolate milk from his fridge as I left
You are free to stop by. I promise to keep my penis in my leather pants
I swear to fucking god if he takes away netflix I will have no problem sending his gf our sex videos
Is that your mom climbing in your window dude
HE WAS CUMMING IN THAT DICK PIC
Ahhh, beer. My second favorite breakfast drink.
Not going to make it tonight. Some cougar at the bar just told me she has dibs on my dick.
Randomize
