dude i was like still drunk, taking pictures of her while she was naked and asleep and she woke up
haha what'd she say
i don't know man, something about us dating. but i never talked to her sober so i said i was making breakfast and snuck out of her house. close calls man WTF
the next time i see a chick with leggings under her jean skirt...i'm gona beat her ass with a fashion magazine...
I am 90% sure the kid in front of me in class is picking his face spots, smelling it, and then eating it. That is a LOT of % sure for something like that.
I now realize that they made gum to take the taste of dick out of your mouth.
I don't see why you're so upset, it's not like you were wearing pants either.
Either I need to stop bringing you back to my apt or I need to stop buying ikea furniture
I face planted right in front of a cop. He looked at me, shook his head, mumbled "freshman" under his breath, helped me up and told us to get home safely. I love college.
He rode a broom down the stairs while we were mattress surfing. Naked. Buck ass naked. WTF
I went to the bar saying i wasn't going to drink that much. I forgot sobriety might as well be some mythical creature when you're with Holleey
DOGS JUST TOTALLY ATE THE FEATHERS OFF MY NIPPLE CLAMPS!!!
Do drug dealers work on Memorial Day?
Remind me to talk to you about nipple clamps.
Finally get to put my practical writing degree to use! I'm writing a craigslist ad for a threesome
I guess I can check "drink alone in the dark" off my bucket list
I just landed at Logan and some guy threw up in the baggage carousel. Boston never really changes
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