At what point did we cease to have vaginas?
Sometime in the sweat pants phase freshman year.
Five things that make you perfect. Go.
The skin of a dead hooker. The blood of the innocent. The soul of a kitten. The hat from cat in the hat. And sunglasses.
I left a bag of circus animal cookies in my car all day. they melted together into on giant cookie. this could either be the best or worst thing ever
chastity bono is officially a man...and has a really hot girlfriend...life doesn't make sense
my brother came home with a bottle of vodka and his pants off. were gonna spend more quality time together.
I think its only fitting my first purchase with my student loan is a glass pipe? I think ill name it 'Subsidized'
This is no lauging matter. Huge cock equals great sex. Marriage to huge cock equals great life.
I can't believe i facilitated a beer for sweater vest deal last night...
Remind me tomorrow to take that ball-gag out of my purse.
That's the last time you call me to prove to some girl at a bar that you're English. It's bad enough that you actually get to fuck them because of it without having to wake me up to seal the deal.
All I ever do is give guys anxiety problems and flaccid penises.
If he refers to me as slump buster one more fucking time.
Is it normal, that tacos make me horny?
dude if looks could fuck you two would've been naked in front of everybody
I’m gonna slowly take you in my mouth and push you deep into my throat so my lips are right up against your body and then I’m gonna fucking bite your shit off if one more of our friends shows me a snap you took while I was giving you head. Are we clear?
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