yo - did your mom get a boob job (I think she did)
im typing and i feel like my hands are on backwards.
Stop texting me, I'm right here.
We've been fucking since Friday.... This is the most committed non-committed relationship I've ever been in
Wednesday. Otherwise known, to you at least, as "there are two gay men in my bed" day.
like teasing for 28 minutes, then the very last 2 minutes is where is ALL goes down. I'm talking, rings off, stable sitting position, hand job madness.
I found your bra. How you get it off the satellite dish is your problem.
This is going to ruin my future wedding planner career, but isn't it better the groom knows he's gay BEFORE he gets married?
I feel like saying your blowjobs are worth a burrito is not the best strategy to get him to be more giving in bed.
Whats your number? 5 or more?
Cinco. It sounds smaller in Spanish.
i got up, ate a McDouble, then went straight back to bed.
You sure know how to make a day worth living.
FOund a bunch of old fireworks spring cleaning.
Who is our new insurance provider?
put something nutritious in your body. AND NOT JUST THAT JOINT.
Night one million where I have madri gra beads around my neck and no justifiable reason for where they came from
LETS THROW SHIT OFF THE PORCH
Like seriously, I would not be going if there wasn't pizza
Randomize
