ugh. my soul tastes like vodka
i feel like verizon should give a sexter of the month award
His apartment number was 69. I had to.
yes we did fuck in his chapter room. yes it was demeaning. and yes, they probably will discuss it at chapter tonight.
I'm in the bar bathroom about to pass out. But it's ok cause I set my alarm to go off for last call
Have you ever had one of those moments when you kept whispering to yourself "I'm not a slut, I'm not a slut..."?
Meghan got a job at the bar. We're now morally obligated to drink. Is this what dreams are made of?
I am making a budget for 2012. Should condoms be in the insurance or entertainment category?
I pulled some girls weeve trying to pull the stop cord on the bus
Exactly. Motivated vaginas are the best kind of vagina
Not genetic. He's drunk and texted me a dick pic. Not genetic. Thank God!
How the hell do you misplace a bag of tacos in a closet?
Must be why he thought choking was foreplay. Like WTF? No.
i do my most serious thinking while screwing her. ive pondered everything from quantum physics to the life cycle of a badger. if i keep this up ill have a phd in no time.
random boy in my bed. last night wasnt a dream. fuck.
Randomize
