i'm three days dirty after drinking 14 hours last night and some other questionable behavior (hula hooping at a large concert, for example) i will just always bring the class. and the sluttiness.
We're hooking up, I have a toothbrush at her place, and yet on leaving her apartment a minute ago we said goodbye with a hi five. WTF?
You're upset about this?
who the fuck tagged pancake nipples on my profile picture?
Been drinkin since 3, wearing a tutu, how could things go wrong
I just found a beer bottle in my xmas tree while disassembling it. God, I'm going to miss the holidays.
For someone who "only drinks patron" your lack of pickiness with men alarms me
I woke up with $100 in my pocket and I was so excited until I found an atm receipt for a $500 withdrawal. Not as exciting.
I feel like everything in this room is sweating
You threw up with your ski mask on still.
Ya I don't think I'm going anywhere, a cum towel, beer, and Vicodin was just exchanged in our white elephant present game
Just so you know, classy bitches change the morning after in a CVS bathroom.
My heart is swelling with pride right now. I fucking love you.
I mean he did ask and he said it's cold out but i didn't realize we were that comfortable hahaha sex is one thing but borrowing a sweatshirt?
Locking that text forever.
i had an epiphany while laying on the driveway for 5 hours yesterday.
i realized i waste a lot of time
He walked in wearing nothing but a WWF belt and yelled "THE CHAMP... IS... HEEERE!!!"
Is it too forward if I ask him to bring a condom when he comes over to work on our project?
Randomize