Just saw truck nuts on a handicap conversion van
The girl here has a popped collar. Can I slap her?
Yes. For all mankind please do.
Then they all walked away with the drinks I bought them, and the fat one slapped me in the face. I left and my car had been towed. Worst night ever.
Apparently riding the dog like its a small horse is frowned upon in this establishment
Ok if you are accepting my apology, please continue to ignore me. If you are not, please fill out the brief survey that follows, to help me improve my people relations: a) your a bitch please leave me alone b)your crazy pls leave me alone c) I never cared ab u please leave me alone. D) all of the above e) all of the above but I wouldn't mind still fucking u. F) who are you again? Your answer will not b shared and will b used in accord. With the law. TY
This may be hard to believe, but that wasn't the first time I was fingered under a snuggie
It's not
I have to stop envisioning penises as dragons.
Occasionally I curse my inner 15 year old when I'm fulfilling their dreams as a slut, but I roll with it.
You showed them your nipple for dollars for the jukebox. You were depressed because only one of your songs played. Oh then you twisted your ankle and blamed it on your mad stripper skills.
No shame in my game.
Is it just me or does the sex still keep getting better? I wasn't crying, my eyes just watered from how hard I was cumming.
You can't call dibs on the bed... every time you party you KO in the bathtub
I shaved my pussy for you. If you complain about a single hair that I missed again, you will be greeted by a bush the next time you go down on me and i will MAKE YOU KEEP GOING
there is absolutely nothing wrong with two grown men staying up all night blowing lines drinking white wine and playing call of duty. don't judge me
There comes a point where there's just condoms and old mcdonalds in your garbage can and you can't tell if you've won or lost.
Talk all the shit you want but I slept in a oversized monster truck tire last night.
Randomize
