you know what scares the shit out of me? i have eaten bagel bites since i was a little kid and just in the past five years they started puting "made with real cheese" WHAT THE FUCK WERE THEY USING BEFORE? i mean ive been a bagel biter since the womb
i went to throw her on my bed and threw her straight in to my bike
my dog ran away and came back with a marajuana plant. what are you doing tonight?
You could give me a blowjob later? :)
I meant do something romantic..
Blowjob In the moonlight?
So i forgot that my head is completely wrapped in gauze, and tried to do the "come hither" look. He think's i'm brain damaged
Midnight run for medical supplies ended several hours later with a lapdance to the Braveheart soundtrack.
Yeah...I know. It's cute I think...I mean cute in a weird like hey I kinda took you home from the bar one night, maybe criticized your penis, and fucked your brains out...kinda sorta way
It was like inception, a dream, in a dream, in the back of a dodge charger.
Yeah. Just jump him. Naked. Claim his dick for yourself.
I'm 50% weirded out and 50% into it
Found the cure to anxiety attacks.
An orgasm
There are grandparents doing keg stands I don't know
skyped with him for 45 min in the bath while i shaved my legs. new level in the relashionship
JB just got pulled over and I am in the trunk...... this isnt good
one nice thing about being home: no walks of shame, just drives of shame
Randomize
