nut hugger
how much do you want to bet that her wedding invites will be vera bradley themed? loser has to frame theirs.
he spent the whole night trying to convince me into a2m. i won't even use the pb til i clean the jelly knife. i love him but it's not going to happen.
I just got three quarters of the way there before I realized I was way too stoned for class so I bought a smoothie and walked home.
Cure to hiccups..road head..high five
just gave a yankee's fan wrong directions to Fenway....welcome to boston asshole
Would it be cruel if i sold xanax instead of adderall to freshman unfamiliar to the drug-taking profession?
Also- bikini mowing was a horrible idea. One truck just drove by 3 times, turning around at the end of the block each time. My tan may be better for it but my conscience has been raped.
This is going to ruin my future wedding planner career, but isn't it better the groom knows he's gay BEFORE he gets married?
Does it count as working out if stops are taken every half hour to smoke a blunt?
I never thought people would keep their guns next to their fake plastic penises, but there they were.
Mom and dad should be so proud half of their children have gotten naked in the same local grocery store
This is me trying to take a picture to send to grandma. At 4. We were trying to look sober.
dollar rum and cokes, see you on the dark side of infinity
I'm pretty sure I broke my breathalyzer by breathing vaporized vodka into it.
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