absolutely 100% incorrect. and i love you more you silk skinned goddess
if all i could do was poop and smoke weed, i'd be eternally happy
amen to that sister
i wish i could swallow nair and shit it out and it would get rid of all my ass hair.
Having him eat chocolate out of you is not as romantic as it sounds. I'm still finding pieces.
I woke up hugging a loaf of bread and a water bottle this morning
My face left an imprint in the loaf...
The extent of my physical activity is running from the cops.
the bar told me i would have to take an hour break so they could wash the shot glasses
He fell on top of me at a party. I slept with him a week later. We've been fucking for 2 moths. Most successful relationship ever.
I have alcoholic tendencies but you know what? College
me + whiskey = a bad person
I WOULD SERIOUSLY RECOMMEND THE SHIT THAT I AM ON RIGHT NOW
Stop acting like the Lucky Charms you're feeding people is actually ecstasy.
I can't believe it is only 1:30...I may have to stab myself with scissors for an excuse to go home...
I kept screaming at his rabbit: "IT'S OKAY, YOU CAN HAVE SOME TRIX. FUCK THOSE SELFISH BITCHES."
Do u believe in the possibility of big foot?
You high??
Randomize
