the night i cant remember will be the night i always remember thanks to my "i
My Vagina smells like Nemo again.
im naked on webcam to her boyfriend, but im playing neopets at the same time, so its all evened out
My brother brings gifts into my room to wrap them. It's a pizza cutter and a box of condoms..
I'm in the bar bathroom about to pass out. But it's ok cause I set my alarm to go off for last call
If I weren't her cousin I'd take advantage of her and this low point in her life.
Well since its impossible for me to swallow a pill this big I'm making wine slushies out of them
I'm doing the Macarena naked in my living room right now
I see you're taking unemployment seriously.
A black suburban rolled up and a scary suited guy got out the passenger side and opened the door for her as she got in. Then drive off. Who did I just fuck?
He overslept for our prescheduled morning sex. The fact that my vagina isn't enough to get him out of bed was the last straw.
"We drove to the deserted part of the parking lot, and that's where we blew each other. It was so romantic."
If my vagina were a person, it just ran a marathon.
Haha I wasn't coming anyway. I'm watching Snow White and don't want to put pants back on. Those are completely unrelated. Have a good night.
I was very impressed with his ability to carry on a conversation with his friends sitting in the front seat with his hand in my pants, getting a hand job, stoned, with a cigarette in his mouth. I think he's a keeper.
i found a picture from last night of you sat on the floor naked, covered in butter and crying. care to explain?
I was hoping you could tell me..
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